diamonds on my neck.

Talk about bling blaow...



The most obscene piece of jewelry ever? And to think I helped pay for that monstrosity.

big pimpin'.

Mando Diao - The Wildfire (If It Was True).mp3

"There's something in the way she said 'I hate you cause you breathe'". That's already a fantastic line in and of itself, but when matched with perfect eh-who-gives-a-fuck attitude and jangly guitars and a soaring major key chorus with horns, its all that and a bag of chips. In fact, the first half of the record that I listened to is solid all around.

Justin Timberlake ft. T.I. - My Love.mp3

I think this is Timberlake's second single off of FutureSex/LoveSounds, possibly the worst title ever slapped onto an album. This track is all over the place: lots of bubbly synths, Timbaland's signature bouncy drums, and layered underneath it all is Timberlake's beatboxing. It's not great, but I wouldn't turn it off if it came on the radio as it is much more interesting to listen to than anything else these days. JT does his schtick as pop star extraordinaire, singing horribly cliche lyrics with flair. All that is fine and dandy until the King comes and completely wrecks shop. The flow is magnificient, catching the cadence of the synths and wrapping every syllable perfectly around the beat. Like Ludacris in 'Yeah', the song is good and all, but its the guest verse that steals the show.

Of Montreal - The Party's Crashing Us (I Am the World Trade Center mix).mp3

I've never heard the orginial song although I am pretty sure Jesse '13 year old girl' Smith sent me the album. Whatever, because this remix is pretty awesome. The only part that bugs me is the guy who mixed it calls himself I Am the World Trade Center. What kind of shitty hipster name is that?

and the truth shall set you free.

via Overheard in NY, definitely one of the funniest sites around.

To be honest, I'm not sure those exist anymore.

TMNTxYoung Jeezy

bubble yum.

Messy.

break ya neck.

Your eyes are not decieving you, those are indeed Reebok Pumps remixed by Alife made completely out of tennis ball material.

And on a completely unrelated note, I hate people that talk about their dogs nonstop like its special in any form or fashion. Unless you're the owner of that dog that shoots like a kajillion free throws in a row, then fall back on the dog talk. It's just fucking rude. Word to David Cross.

senorita.

more here

Nobody even comes close. suuuuuuuuriously.

G's up, ho's down.

I'm willing to bet Snoop Dogg had no idea he was going to change the world. He was probably just smoking a blunt, downing some 40s with his homeboys and whatnots in the shitty part of town when he was like, 'yo cuz, you know what? fuck them bitches, nigga. G's up, ho's down. for life.' Fast forward a decade or so and its now one of the most prevalent ideas among males.

Now, I'm not saying the idea of male empowerment hasn't been around. But in this day and age of Paris Hiltons, feminists and other generally dumb teenage girls who actually want to be the 4 over-the-hill single bitches in Sex and te City, I think all men have to toast Mr. D-O-double-G for coming up with a singular phrase that defines that mentality, and gives us all something to believe in.

Before you label me a sexist or woman hater and so forth, check out a pretty much fool-proof test on women:

a girl will think something is cute because a) it is proportionally smaller than usual, and/or b) something tries to imitate an adult action but fails miserably.

bonus points if its shiny.

Props to Mr. O'Bannon for the moment of genius.

Also: read up on A Man's Right To Choose (via Bol)

To cap things off, here is a great video by the Arctic Monkeys detailing an excellent example of why the world would be a much better place if it was indeed G's up, and ho's down.

posted up.

the only good set from the vice photo issue.
(more here)

well, this one too, but it makes me feel dirty inside.

heat redemption.

lady in the street.


freak in the bed.


To redeem myself from the shit sandwich below

coasting.

I'm going to venture out into the dangerous land of self indulgence and introspection for a second, so bear with me.

I've been awash in a sea of mediocrity for the longest time. Never great, never bad, never cared. It has always kind of bothered me, cause it's fucking boring. Not to mention I don't particularly like run of the mill things. Either kick ass or suck ass, middle ground breeds apathy. The sad fact is that most people are run of the mill. Maybe it's time to accept that fact and deal with it. Maybe it's time to get off my ass and 'reach my potential'. Both choices sound like shit. One sounds like settling and the other sounds like an infomercial for a 36 tape pack of motivational bullshit.

All successful people are driven, that's the uniting factor. Nobody successful lucked on to it completely. I just want to know how the hell people stay motivated at something. They must make up some fantastic bullshit about how hard work means they'll end up with puppies and white picket fences. And they must believe that is what will make them happy. And they have to believe that nonsense for their whole lives. That just seems delusional. Maybe that's the key to being successful in this world. You lie to yourself so much, that you start believing it.

Fuck everything I just wrote, I pretty much know what I want. Lots and lots of money. Like ridiculous amounts. God, being one of those old money blue blood rich asshole wasps must kick so much ass. You might have to wear yellow shorts with lobsters on it or something gay like that, but I'm willing to let that slide.

What a horrible post.

the second coming.

Most anticipated movie of 2006?

I'm willing to bet it'll at least be the best.

sexyback.

Yes, this is a woman who has had two kids.

note: Dog Problems isn't actually that bad. I guess I kind of like showtunes. No homo.

The Format - Dog Problems album review.

During this period of horrible music, I can safely say this is one of the very few albums I had been looking forward to. I thoroughly enjoyed Interventions & Lullabies, it was a very impressive piece of pop music. It was heavy on hooks, melodies and harmonies that stayed on repeat way after most songs should, yet it didn't feel unwelcomed at all. Not to mention I discovered it at the right time, where I could relate to the lyrics and themes presented. As I have said over and over again, that is not the case nowadays. However, because my days are so void of activity, I'll give this a spin.

Matches

I spot a banjo, harpsichord, piano, bells and snare rolls. I guess this is supposed to sound like a symphonic band or some shit. Not half bad, but I can't imagine myself singing along.

I'm Actual

This is in 6/8. I hate 6/8. This isn't very good, it's got some strings. Pretty hokey arrangement. No wonder their label dropped them. I'd be pissed off if I was supposed to somehow market this to 16 year olds.

Time Bomb

Halfway decent verses, closer to something on Interventions & Lullabies. Extremely mediocre chorus. I'm not a big fan of the bridge where Nate the singer starts yelping. I don't know what the fuck he is saying, but I do know he sounds like a bitch. Also not a fan of the 'are you worth it' part where he drags the melody way up there.

She Doesn't Get It

This is better, some synth, handclaps, doo doo doos, just straightforward pop. Can't say this will be memorable in any way though. Still better than everything that preceded it.

Pick Me Up

I guess the earlier tracks were a weedout process, because this is better than the last song. If this is the case, the last track must be almost half as good as Hey Jealousy (word to the Gin Blossoms).

Dog Problems

This sounds like a showtune. Why the fuck would you try to sound like a showtune. Swingtime piano with horns. I can't imagine myself repeating this one.

Oceans

Picks back up again from that last stupid attempt at 'expanding our musical horizons'. Pop tunes like this are what The Format excell at, although this song might be a little too sweet. The replay value is lowered because of that. It's like that Natasha Bedingfield song, it was awesome the first 50 times I heard it, but now I can't stand it anymore.

Dead End

Not paying attention.

Snails

Missed this too.

The Compromise

This is what the whole album should sound like. Word to everything this song kicks ass. The guitars, the vocals, everything. Nothing fancy, just good pop rock.

Inches and Failing

Did you guys know I sent a kid to a psychiatrist last year?

If Work Permits

Might be good, I donno.

Overall: 5/10?

Definitely not worth the 15 bucks I dropped on this, especially when Interventions and Lullabies is only 10 at Best Buy. Although I didn't pay nearly enough attention to it to really review it. Maybe I'll dig it up after I get all teh ghey over a chick again some time in the future. Probably not.

Q: you know how i know that you're gay?

A: you like coldplay.



word.

eternal summer slacking.

Gin Blossoms - Hey Jealousy.mp3

Talk about gangsta shit of catastrophic proportions. This is that good stuff right here. At first it might not seem like anything special, but that semi-awkward melody in the chorus will get stuck in your head and will not leave. It's semi-awkward cause it's actually pretty hard to sing, especially the third 'hey jealous-yyyy', when you're walking around town humming it to yourself you'll realize that you are pretty much tone deaf and devoid of any god given musical capabilities. True story.

The topic matter is pretty straightforward, I think about a quarter of songs written are about how person A fucked up a relationship with person B. And since they're 1) white folks, and 2) not Dipset, they take the rather sentimental route and ponder 'what if?' for 3 and a half minutes. No matter, this is not sappy in any way. It is more of an acknowledgement to what was and what could have been if not for those wonderful instances of self-destructive behavior. And really, who can't relate to that?

11/10

T.I. - 99 Problems (Lil' Flip diss).mp3

I don't even know why the King wastes his breath on leprechaun rejects like Flip. I guess Tip just needs something to do in his free time. Flowing hard and smooth over Rick Rubin's 808 drums, T.I. does not let up on the Clover G, threatening and having a general ball kicking down the holes in his opponent's street credibility. 'Lyrically I'll murk you/physically I'll hurt you/you ain't never ran the streets/you had a curfew'. True as with all diss tracks, the shit talking at the end is undoubtedly better than the actual song. The shock in Tip's voice when he speaks on Flip's 'audacity' to mention his name is straight up fucking hilarious. 'Fuckboy' Flip needs to just let it go, the throne is taken, the King is crowned.

7/10

Lily Allen - Little Things.mp3

(Not to be confused with the horrible Good Charlotte song of the same name.)

This chick is going/went through the whole internet blog hype machine which basically swagger jacks NME's whole 'lift them up, then tear them down' schtick and speeds it up so it happens all within a week. Regardless of what everybody thinks, this song is not bad, especially if you're a chick. Lily Allen is a rapper/singer/musician from the UK and she tells some good stories over sappy samples and drum machines. Lyrically this is the female rendition of Hey Jealousy. Same topic matter, done totally differently of course. It's much more personal as rap allows for much more detail to be said into each couplet and verse. Generally this kind of stuff sucks, as the whole reminiscing vibe is not my steez, but this song is ok for the first 3 listens or so. Then it just starts getting annoying. Maybe it's just cause I don't have a vag.

4/10

the motherland.

word to everything.

all day, everyday.

jesus might say 'jesus christ!'

can't touch this.

Fishin' buddies no more. Much to me and big lo's dismay, I do not get cable here in hong kong so i have not been watching any mavs ball.

I purchased what is possibly one of the greatest t-shirts of all time yesterday. The problem is that I had to lay down 40 bucks for it, even though asian people have no idea whatsoever why the Hammer shirt is awesome. This includes my mom who gave me dirty looks for spending 40 bucks on a stupid t-shirt. Good thing her opinion regarding these things mean absolutely nothing. Next on the list: shiny leather sneakers and a nigger smurf.

word to everything.